Trust building between parents and teenage children can be no less than a complex task to accomplish. Teenage years are, no doubt, some of the perplexing and weird years of an individual’s life. Our body is going through changes, our thoughts are changing and the world around us is changing as well when we witness the harsh reality of life and growing up. Amidst it all, many teenagers might feel alone in their struggle and feel disconnected from their parents. This is a phase we all have gone through. Due to this sense of disconnection between a teenage child and a parent, the child might start hiding stuff from the parents. As a parent, this phase can be challenging. To help a child get through these formative years of life without any strain on their personality and the relation between the child and the parents, it is extremely important to develop trust.
If you are struggling to connect with your teenage child then here are some helpful tips and advice to help you get through with it. So, without any delay let’s dive right into them!
Give Them Freedom
During these formative years of life, teens are always looking for a place, or easily to sum it up, an individual to confide in. They go through and come across certain things and parents sometimes tend to be too strict on them. This is not a good idea. Restraining a child of any age group will never ever work. Keeping the leash too tight will suffocate them while letting them leash-free might result in them wandering off somewhere bad. To avoid this, keep your behavior moderate. Let them discover life on their own. Let them make the same mistakes you made in your teenage years. Experiences have a far better chance of teaching than just words themselves.
For example, stopping your child from attending gatherings on their own, not giving them, and keeping aware of social media in this day and age of advancement will only lead to rebellion. Introduce them to new ways of life and let them be!
But this also means that freedom does not come for free. You need to make it clear to your child that they need to earn your trust as well. Too much freedom will not result in pleasant outcomes as well. Let them know that their actions will have consequences as well.
Give Them Space
Your child is not a baby anymore, you need to understand that. Although parents have the best interests in their mind, they can be a little nosy. A growing teenager never likes that. Learn to give your children privacy when they need it. This will help in developing a strong bond of trust between the parent and the child. If you keep intruding on your child’s personal space it will leave an impression on them that you don’t trust them enough to let them be alone leading to rocky roads ahead. Instead, give your child some personal space so that they know their parents trust them enough and now it’s up to them to keep that trust alive and thriving through their actions.
Consider this: Your child wants to go on a school trip with their friends. If there is not a good enough reason to refuse, don’t hold them back just so they can be kept safe from societal evils. Give your child a chance to see how they behave in a situation like this. As mentioned before, this will tell your child that you trust them to be on their own. Let them know that you are trusting them and hope that they keep this boat of mutual trust afloat through their actions.
Strong Communication is a Key to Build Trust.
Healthy communication is the key to healthy relations, no doubt in that. I have seen many families where lack of communication between the child and parents has surfaced multiple issues. Lack of communication in any relationship leads to misunderstandings and problems. Build a strong communication system with your child. Keep it friendly and light. Don’t overwhelmingly react to their secrets. This way, you will earn your child’s trust. They will confide in you for their secrets and solutions.
Know what is going on in your child’s mind. Parents often misunderstand a teenager’s frustration as a phase that will pass. While that is true to some extent, lack of communication can lead to situations worsening. When your child needs you the most, be there. Know what they are feeling and reassure them. Know your child to build a strong bond of trust.
Change Yourself to Make Your Child Trust You.
Your child is no longer a toddler whom you can make up the stories for and sometimes even excuses if you have made a mistake. We all have been through that. Teenagers have a knack for sensing fake energy from a mile away. If you need to correct your child and teach them the ways of leading a good life, teach them through your actions. You cannot tell your child to go to sleep early if you are up all night yourself. This might be a bit hard but you have got to do it. Your child watches every step of yours and learns from you, both consciously and subconsciously.
Make way for positive changes in your routine and habits. Show your child through actions how much being responsible and mature in life is important. Just lecturing them about it all will annoy them.
Forgiveness is The Key
There is no doubt in the fact that every human being makes mistakes. They can either be silly or grave. The point is, no one is pure, and expecting a pitch-perfect behavior from your child will lead to a strained relation between you and your child. If you give out harsh reactions to any of your child’s mistakes and guilt trip them rather than helping them out, you will lose your child’s trust. If they confess a mistake, let them know there is no need to fear in confiding to their parents. Don’t outright lash out at them and curse them. Your child might not consider you to be a confidant ever again. Be like a friend to them but also let them know that if they go past their limits, they will face consequences.